1 - I. Fight fire with fire!
“Turn it down.” I looked him straight in the eyes. There was no turning back now. I was burning all bridges. If before he just ignored me, now he will hate me.
“What the fuck? Turn what down?” His face was now a lot closer to mine and his eyes seemed a lot darker than I remembered them being. I took a deep breath.
“Your fucking ego! You’re not on stage holding a guitar, there isn't a crowd of twenty thousand people worshiping the ground you walk on and there aren't a bunch of girls ready to drop on their knees and suck your dick! No need for the fucking attitude!”
Published 06/14/12 | 1347 words | Het | Adult
2 - II. Brake Me, Shake Me.
Her eyes just about burn me to a crisp, pulling me back to reality. She didn't look away, she didn't blink, staring right back at me. And then... just for a split second I saw something in her eyes, something that was contradicting her words, but it quickly drowned in the stormy ocean of her anger.
Published 06/14/12 | 3107 words | Het | Adult
3 - III. Somewhere in time...
I was standing in the middle of a battlefield, holding my sword in tightly clenched fist. Thick blood was dripping slowly from the tip of the blade, heavily dropping into the dirt. The air was filled with the sounds of metal against metal and screams of death, enemies were all around us. I turned my head to the left and saw Angel, but I knew in this world her name was Helen... my Helen, she swung her sword sending Roman soldiers in front of her to the ground. Memories were returning to me slowly.
Published 06/15/12 | 1475 words | Het | Adult
4 - IV. This Love.
Oh... shit... they're all in my room! I finally got my clothes on, James' shirt was way too big and kept falling off my shoulder.
Published 06/16/12 | 848 words | Het | Adult
5 - V. I've Got The Fire!
He pushed me through the first door he saw and we stumbled into the small room, still kissing and caressing each other’s bodies, burning with desire. His hands were unzipping my pants while mine were off working on his. I pushed his shirt up and he let go of me for a second to rip it off. My top followed his shirt to the floor and we both sigh when our naked bodies touched.
“Hm... um... guys...” Someone’s voice got through my clouded mind and I looked behind James' back. Two roadies were standing there with very amused looks on their faces.
“Everybody, get the fuck out!” James turned back with a growl.
Published 06/17/12 | 1386 words | Het | Adult
6 - VI. All I need is you.
I have never been so nervous in my life, not even before my first gig. Hands kept shaking, palms were wet, and I kept rubbing the sweat off on my pants, talking to myself out-loud.
“Come on James, calm down! What the fuck?”
We have been together for over a year now, and I knew that she loved me as much as I loved her, but this was big. I had been planning this for four months, I wanted it to be perfect.
Published 06/18/12 | 902 words | Het | Adult
7 - VII. Down With The Sickness.
A few bright yellow dots jumped in front of me, covering my view of the guitar, sounds started to fade, I couldn't feel my legs, but it felt like I was moving. I was moving down... My hands heavily slid on the strings, Steven's face came close, from the side. I saw his lips moved, but I couldn't hear anything, just a loud ringing in my ears. He dropped his bass and caught me as I was about to hit the floor. Everything varnished as if someone turn the master switch off.
Published 06/19/12 | 1739 words | Het | Adult
8 - VIII. Life Won't Wait.
“I need to get to the pharmacy first and after that I'll tell you everything...” I watch her quickly pulling on her clothes... to quickly.. in the hurry... My heart sunk. Frantic movements, pale skin, inability to concentrate, urgent need for a fix, I saw it all before. Drugs.
Published 06/19/12 | 1387 words | Het | Adult
9 - IX. Lightning Strikes Twice.
Waking up was never my favorite part of the day, and waking up after a hard and long night of drinking was even worse. I swallowed, feeling saliva barely making it's way down dry as a desert throat. I opened my eyes and the brightly lit room brought the pounding headache to its peak. I sat up and covered my eyes with my hands, shit... why did I drink so much? I stood up and dragged myself to the bathroom, in hope that nice hot shower would help me feel human again.
Published 06/20/12 | 1695 words | Het | Adult
10 - X. Fade to black...
The last song was over, we said our goodbyes and started heading off the stage when one of the roadies ran up to James and whispered something in his ear. I saw James' face change, he grip to the roadies' shoulders pushing him back.
“No!” His rocking voice roared over the suddenly quiet crowd. His face turned white as he dropped to his knees, covering his face with his hands.
Published 06/21/12 | 3224 words | Het | Adult
11 - XI. Boys will be boys...
She interpreted my smile as an invitation and walked around my chair, stopping right in front of me. Kirk moved back with an amused smile on his face. James smiled wide, obviously thinking I'm going to set that girl straight. Other guys giggled, waiting for me to tell the stripper to get lost, like I often did before, but I leaned back into my chair, slowly spreading my knees, and turning all my attention to the blonde. Okay boys, lets see who will have the last smile.
Published 06/22/12 | 1407 words | Het | Adult
12 - XII. Hell's Bells.
“Fuck! I told you it was a bad idea!” I sat myself up, trying to get my wet hair off my face. Steve and Jim were putting last flames down with the fire extinguisher, covering all mess in white foam. Smoke was raising up to the ceiling.
“I wasn't planning for you to set this place on fire!” Bruce helped me out of the water and got out himself. “And don't say fuck in church!”
Published 06/23/12 | 1121 words | Het | Adult
13 - XIII. Bring your daughter to the slaughter.
I turned to the side, and tried to get up, holding up to the wall, and leaving blood marks all over the white paint. I pulled the phone off the hook, dialing emergency number and bent over with a cough shaking my body, twisting more pain out of my broken ribs. I fell back to the floor spitting out blood, and choking. Everything turned red, then black...
Published 06/24/12 | 2454 words | Het | Adult
14 - XIV. Touch too Much.
“I really miss you... I want you...” Her voice changed to soft and playful. “James... What are you wearing right now?”
Needless to say all thoughts about some guy and all that I'd imagines were gone in a second. I laid down on the bed, closing my eyes with anticipation.
“Just jeans...” My lips smiled.
“Mnnnn... I love those tight jeans on you... so sexy.... outline everything... perfect fit...” She murmured back, making my jeans feel tighter. God, this woman can drive me from angry to feral with just a few simple words. I run my hand down my chest and lower to my stomach.
Published 06/25/12 | 3162 words | Het | Adult
15 - XV. Open your eyes.
By the time I got to the door I was as hard as I have ever been. I could see Angel's naked figure through the fogged glass, she was standing with her back to me under the water, singing.
“I'm your truth, telling lies, I'm your reasoned alibis...”
I quietly opened the shower door and wrapped my arms around my wife's body, kissing her shoulder, whispering into her skin.
“I'm inside open your eyes....”
Published 06/26/12 | 1912 words | Het | Adult
16 - XVI. Every Breath You Take...
God, I love this man so much... I love him to pieces. Love this little twist on his hairline, that makes his hair curl upwards above his forehead, love his amazing blue eyes, his button nose, love when he wrinkles it making funny faces... I love those scars on his cheeks, his tender lips, that could be so demanding, so passionate... love his mustache, that tickles my skin, when he kisses me... love his strong neck, love how it flashes, tensing up right before he comes... his broad shoulders... his long strong arms, love when he wraps them around me, making me feel absolutely safe.
Published 06/27/12 | 3974 words | Het | Adult
17 - XVII. Blackened.
“James!!!” Multiple loud screams filled the air. People were running to me from the sides of the stage, like in a slow motion movie. I stepped back, trying to get away from the fire, and saw Angel standing up with a white face, holding Kat close to her and covering my daughter's eyes with her hand. I tried to walk to them, but my knees weakened, my mind felt numb, unable to process so much pain. I saw the stage floor coming at me in a weird angle before dark fog filled all around me...
Published 06/28/12 | 1477 words | Het | Adult
18 - XVIII. Here for you.
I smiled and pulled the syringe out, taking the cover off the needle. I looked at the fluid inside of it, funny how this can kill... It would be more impressive if I had a sword and just stabbed it into his chest, but this would have to do, maybe less showy but more powerful. I stepped to the line that was connected to his arm, running with fluids. Take it in your hands and just inject it in, so simple... so easy... Here it goes... taking a life for love. I looked at his face, and smirked.
“You should've died on stage... that would have saved me the trouble... but don't worry, I'll take good care of her, I'll be there for her when she morns you, wiping the tears from her eyes, holding her close, letting her cry on my shoulder, comforting her... and you'll be powerless to stop me. Time to go to Hell, goodbye...”
Published 06/29/12 | 5142 words | Het | Adult
19 - XIX. All That She Wants.
“Angel, are you okay? What is this all about?” He put the tray on the kitchen table and helped himself to a piece of cheese.
“Nothing! Can't I look in the mirror?” I turned away and started to empty chips into a bowl.
“Okay, let's hear it, what happened?” He grabbed a few chips from the bowl and I smacked him on the hand.
“Get your hands off, it's for the guests!”
“I am a guest!” He stuffed hand full of chips in his mouth. “So... why're you checking yo-self in the mirror?”
“I was just fixing my hair.”
“Mmh, on your ass.” He giggled, choking on his food, and I quickly handed him a can of soda to wash his food down. He gulped it in, released a few more coughs.
Published 06/30/12 | 3987 words | Het | Adult
20 - XX. Can I play with madness?
When James came back to the studio, he still had his catty smile on.
“You didn't focking tell her did you?” Lars sat up on the couch.
James grabbed himself a beer and dropped on the couch with a smirk.
“Nope, not yet... she can't back out now. You all like her, right?”
“Is that a trick question? If I say yes, you'll hurt me, if I say no, you'll hurt me.” Lars laughed.
Published 07/01/12 | 7232 words | Het | Adult
21 - XXI .The evil that men do.
“I see you're still wasting your time with this motherfucker.” Slash was standing behind me with a grin on his face.
“You better watch your fucking mouth, mop head!” I glared at him.
“Well you are a mother... and he's...” His grin grew wider.
“Choose your next words very carefully.” I noticed that everyone around us had suddenly grown quiet and you could taste the tension of the moment.
Published 07/02/12 | 7149 words | Het | Adult
22 - XXII. Bad to the bone.
The stripper's hand ran along the front rim of her hat and the other playfully moved along her side and over the top of her bra, then to her stomach and her hip. Mnnnhh... very nice! She turned her back to me once again and slowly went down to the floor, standing with her back to the pole.
I watched her ass slide down and rise back up on the metal rod and my body flushed with another wave of heat. Mnnn... more! She straightened her legs, curving her back to the pole and I swallowed, suddenly feeling my mouth watering. That is sooo... my body betrayed me, releasing a raspy growl.
Published 07/03/12 | 5755 words | Het | Adult
23 - XXIII. Fear of the dark.
Another wave of shivers danced through my body and I rubbed my arms with my hands, looking around. What in the hell? A very familiar feeling of been watched washed over me making my skin crawl. What the fuck? My eyes scanned faces around me, but no one was looking my way. Okay... I'm just imagining things... just nerves... I quickly dialed Andrew's phone and heard busy signal. He's probably calling me. I pushed to disconnect and stepped back to get a better view of everyone in the crowd.
Published 07/04/12 | 3731 words | Het | Adult
24 - XXIV. Man on the edge.
“Mister Hetfield, I need to talk to you... alone. I'm at your gate, if you don't mind walking over...” I recognized the voice of detective Brook.
“You have news?” I jumped from the chair and ran to the door.
“I have news... and I hope we're wrong about it...”
Published 07/05/12 | 2177 words | Het | Adult
25 - XXV. I'm Running Free, Yeah!
So this is how you feel after you killed someone? I thought it would be more intense, more... I don't know... just more. It had been three days since I'd done it, and I kept waiting for more. All those books I read about the remorse of killers, or how some of them got off by taking someone's life, that it made them feel like a God for that moment. I didn't feel any of that. It was like a normal everyday work, disgusting, hard, but just normal work.
Published 07/06/12 | 2146 words | Het | Adult
26 - XXVI. Welcome to the jungle.
“Mister Hetfield, I have more news! The Brussels police called with more information on the murder case.” The familiar, usually calm voice of detective Brook sounded excited. “One name that came up in connection with the remains is Chris Benjamin Barnato.”
“Motherfucker!” A low bear growl rose up from my chest when I heard that name, red light flashed in my head, and I almost crushed the small cell phone in my tightened fist.
Published 07/07/12 | 3166 words | Het | Adult
27 - XXVII. Stranger in a Strange Land
I felt someone's hand moving on my wrist. James... Oh, thank God it was a dream! I smiled and opened my eyes. A stranger's face, with big green eyes, was right above me, he was kneeling by my side. My smile vanished off my lips and I felt blood rushing from my head. Oh no, my nightmare continues! They found me! No, no, no... I quickly moved my arms away and backed into the wall behind me.
Published 07/08/12 | 2007 words | Het | Adult
28 - XXVIII. ...And Justice For All
The only thing that was bothering me was the unstoppable and very annoying itching-burning pain of the wound on my wrist. The skin around the cut was red and swollen, I soaked my scarf in the cool water and wrapped it around my arm, welcoming the immediate relief. When I came back inside, Max looked at me and raised his eyebrows.
“Wow, I was wrong! Now I can see, you'll make a very high prized trophy! If I sell you on the market, I can get enough to live here comfortably for a few years... hm.. that's a good idea.”
“Watch it, Indiana Bears, or you may find your tranquilizer gun where the sun don't shine!”
Published 07/10/12 | 3374 words | Het | Adult
29 - XXIX. Remember Tomorrow.
Max pulled me to the side of the hill, my leg fell thought a soft patch of the ground and I lost my balance falling into the hole, pulling him with me. We slid down on the long wet dirt tunnel and dropped onto something wet and sticky. The rancid stench of ammonia made me gag and I instinctively covered my nose, but immediately pulled my hand away from my face, feeling that it was covered in the smelly substance.
“What in the hell is that smell?” I sat up and tried to hold my breath, covering my mouth with the bottom of my shirt.
“Guano. Ssshhh... Don't talk.”
Published 07/11/12 | 4185 words | Het | Adult
30 - XXX. Afraid To Shoot Strangers.
I looked at Angel, she got ahead and was now walking in front of me. I can't believe I hit on her, what the hell I was thinking? I bet it was those ammonia vapors. I would never talk to a woman like that on the clear mind. I can't ever find words to get attention of a girls I like. And then when she started unbutton her shirt... for a split second I thought she was coming on to me... I so would... if she... I would, without second thought. Oh for God sake! She from a different world, married... I like her as a friend, just as a friend.
Published 07/12/12 | 3033 words | Het | Adult
31 - XXXI. Where The Wild Things Are.
The beast's mouth opened, baring crooked black teeth and his skin raised and bubbled with bloody puss, multiple limbs gripped at the ground and surrounding walls with terrifying claws. The stench of sulfur hit my nose, making me back against the wall.
“Angel, run!” Berry's voice drowned in chilling roar of the beast and the fear bolted my feet to the ground.
The beast turned to me and I saw his face honeycombed with squirming, nauseating, little worm-like creatures, his eyes peered at me. I couldn't move in my horror, hypnotized by the eyes of the monster that were living fire whirl pools.
Published 07/13/12 | 2754 words | Het | Adult
32 - XXXII. No More Tears.
I felt a thumb circling on the inside of my left palm, then soft lips touched my skin and I smiled, only one person in this world does that. My eyes flew open and I sighed.
“Hi baby, how do you feel?” He leaned to me from the chair by my bed.
“Stating the obvious again?” I turned to the sound of the voice of my brother and saw Bruce sitting on the other side of the bed.
Published 07/14/12 | 1886 words | Het | Adult
33 - XXXIII. Nothing Else Matters.
After I washed my wife's hair, making sure that the bandage on her right arm didn't get wet, I carefully lathered soap on her body and she moaned softly when my hands ran over her breasts. Oh God, she is so beautiful and I miss her so much! She turned in my arms and I laughed when she rubbed on me, spreading foam on my chest.
“Hey! I'm washing you, not the other way around.”
“I'm helping, see, full body wash cloth works much better... oohhh... look it even has a handle...” A wicked smile played on her lips when she grasped her fingers on my cock.
Published 07/15/12 | 3868 words | Het | Adult
34 - XXXIV. We Will Rock You.
“I used to be nervous, but then I discover a great relaxing technique.” Steve grinned.
“Like meditation? I heard that some people use it to relax, I never tried it myself, but they say it works great.” I turned to him and heard Lars snort.
“Nope, I just I became a member of the Mile High Club.” Steve winked at me.
“What's the Mile High Club? Some private club for people with a fear of heights?” I asked.
Lars choked on his beer and started coughing. Angel and James stopped kissing and turned my way, smiling. Steve and Bruce looked at me with amused faces. Ray pick up his head from his notebook and smirked.
Published 07/16/12 | 5114 words | Het | Adult
35 - XXXV. Welcome Home.
“Okay. Let's see.... the Prince and the Princess loved each other very much, they had a beautiful baby girl and were very happy. But the evil dragon envied their happiness and wanted the Princess for himself. He waited until she was far away from the castle and the Prince, and stole her.”
“Why didn't the princess kick his ass?”
“Uh, baby girl... don't say that word. Those are adult words, you can't use them until you're all grown up.”
“Kay, so why didn't she beat him up?”
“He sneaked up on her, that evil piece of... evil dragon. She tried to free herself from his grip, but he used a poison on her, that made her fall asleep. He drove her to the airport, got on the plane and flew her far away to a different country.”
Published 07/17/12 | 1610 words | Het | Adult
36 - XXXVI. One Wild Night.
I made my way through the house, stopping to chit-chat with a few old friends and finally got to the kitchen, but she wasn't there either. Maybe she got a bit tired? I decided to go upstairs and check the bedroom. I hope she feels okay. My worry flew me up to the third floor and I walked to the bedroom door. It was closed and I just got my hand on the handle, when I heard Lisa's giggling voice.
“Angel, wait! Let me take my blouse off first... Oh fuck, and my bra!”
Ohh.... what's this? Mmmnnhh... sounds kinky! Good thing I didn't just barge in. Hehehe...
“So how does this work?” Lisa's voice continued.
Yes, tell me... I'm all ears. The grin on my face grew wider.
Published 07/18/12 | 11436 words | Het | Adult
37 - XXXVII. Girls, Girls, Girls...
“You have a secret too?” Lisa walked to the closet and opened the door, her eyes stopping on the leather dress that I kicked in there earlier this morning. “Oh... this wasn't there last night.. What's this? Oh... leather boots, a dress... and a whip... nice.” She winked at me, picking up the dress and putting it to her body.
“She has a whip in there, too?” Cindy giggled, making herself comfortable on the floor by the bed.
“Sorry, I forgot about that... Kat came in this morning and I just threw it in there... just ignore that. That's not important right now.” I pulled the dress out of Lisa's hands, threw it back in the closet, and closed the door.
“What the hell did you do to him? Hand cuff him and whip his ass?” I heard Cindy's voice and turned. She was twirling the hand cuffs on her finger, her face lit with a wicked grin. Oh for fuck's sake... I rolled my eyes, sitting down on the floor by Cindy.
“Ohhh... nice! Is that how you keep him behaving?” Lisa smirked.
Published 07/20/12 | 2821 words | Het | Adult
38 - XXXVIII. When The Levee Breaks...
“Oh shit!” I looked in horror at my wet pants. Oh...no...
“Did you laugh a little too hard?” Kirk eyes were set on my embarrassment. “It's okay, trust me, one time or another each one of us has pissed themselves and we weren't pregnant, all this weight pushing on your bladder and all...”
“James...” I interrupted Kirk, gripping onto my husband arm in terror.
“It's fine, it's a bit funny, but I thi--”
“JAMES! I didn't piss myself... call the ambulance...”
“Angel, what's wrong?” James' face turned serious.
“My water just broke...” I whispered, fighting another painful cramp, much stronger than the previous one.
“I'M IN LABOR!!!”
Published 07/21/12 | 4328 words | Het | Adult
39 - XXXIX. Low Man's lyrics.
My movements sped up, feeling the release building inside of me, and my grip on the long blonde hair tightened before I spilled my load with one last thrust and a grunt. My hands let go of the groupie's hair and I backed out, zipping my jeans, and once again feeling like a complete ass. The cheap thrill was over, and all that was left was the bitter taste of guilt. The girl stood up, wiping her lips and looking at me with a question in her eyes. The smile that was about to emerge on her face froze when she saw my expression.
Published 07/22/12 | 1944 words | Het | Adult
40 - XXXX. Damage Inc.
I made my way inside, trying not to get too much attention, but as soon as I looked beyond the crowd I stopped dead in my tracks. What the fuck? Angel was standing on the bar stand with a bottle of tequila in her mouth. She finished it and looked over the crowd with a drunk smirk.
“Nope... didn't even touch it... I need more!”
Published 07/23/12 | 6969 words | Het | Adult
41 - XXXXI. Bleeding me.
Whoever said that time heals all wounds was never hurt like this... this pain in my bleeding heart didn't stop, it didn't get lighter, it was always there, every day, every moment, it became a part of me. Time went on, days turned into weeks, weeks into months... almost half a year passed in a fog. I tried to distract myself by jumping into work, but it wasn't helping... I couldn't write my music, I couldn't play... it felt as though someone had removed the living essence from me.
Published 07/24/12 | 2180 words | Het | Adult
42 - XXXXII. Innocent Exile.
The room and the outside of the window were as dark as my thoughts. I looked at the clock and gripped my backpack tighter, one more hour. I hope my plan works, I hope it all works. I was desperate, I had to do something, and I came up with a great idea. At least at the time is seemed great... it took me two days to organize everything. I had to call Nicholas for help, he was the oldest one I knew, but most importantly, he had a boat.
Of course I didn't plan to just ran away and get in trouble, I wanted my parents to think I was missing... The idea came to me at night after my birthday party. I thought back to the day when I found out the horrible news.
Published 07/25/12 | 6494 words | Het | Adult
43 - XXXXIII. If That's What It Takes.
“You said you hated that fucking tree, but in the winter we found peeled bark on the bottom of the trunk, and you were so mad. You waited all day with a bee-bee gun by the tree to shoot the intruder, and when a small rabbit showed up and you couldn't help it and said 'Aaawwww, he's so cute!'” Angel turned to me with a fade smile on her face.
“And you started to make fun of me... saying that a big scawwy man likes a small baby wabbitt...” I dared to smile back.
Published 07/26/12 | 3290 words | Het | Adult
44 - XXXXIV. Sea Of Madness.
Another picture card, another answer, another day of mind games. He tries to get in, cracking the code of my shield, I'm trying to help him, and my subconsciousness fights back. Another day of feeling mentally exhausted, another day of feeling exposed, and then it will be another night of crying myself to sleep with the image of Angel by our tree, her words giving me hope and strength. 'I'll be here, I'll be right here, waiting for you... I promise you that.' My eyes trailed to the window and John lowered his hand with the card.
“James, I'm here to help you, but only if you let me.”
“I know, I'm trying... I just... I don't know how to help you...”
“You need to let go of everything, everything that you left outside when you walked through these doors... including her.”
Published 07/27/12 | 8687 words | Het | Adult
45 - XXXXV. All Within My Hands.
Another two months had passed, for the first time in my life I was working through my issues without numbing myself with alcohol. It was uncomfortable and mentally draining, I felt like I was on an emotional roller coaster, but as time went on, my subconsciousness finally gave up fighting back and I started to trust John. Maybe a part of it all was that I wasn't afraid of Angel to see me like this. Her tour had started, and I knew she wouldn't be able to visit me until it was over, by that time I was planning to come out of rehab with spare time to recharge and get ready for our talk.
Published 07/28/12 | 6207 words | Het | Adult
46 - XXXXVI. Epilogue. We'll never stop, we'll never quit!
“Are you kidding me? It goes like this: You are the essence of cool. You sing like a Devil, and you play guitar like a God. Your smile can melt an iceberg, your blue eyes make bad girls lose their witty tongue, and your dirty smirk makes good girls wish they were bad. When you step out on that stage, there is no woman in the audience that doesn't wish for a few moments alone with you. But... it's not even that... it's what you have here.” I placed my hand on my husband's chest. “Your big heart, women can sense it. They know that under this shell of a bad boy there is a big heart of a real man, not a made up, makeup covered, make belief puppet.”
Published 07/30/12 | 2712 words | Het | Adult
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