|Feedback by marjain - 08/13/17 - 02:43AM|
|Oh dear, the emotions in here and in my head. This is a way to make them all come out of the daylight. Whole situation start to unravel and hopefully everyone has a change for a good ending. Oh you gotta write the story behind david's situation. Would love to hear how he got himself in there and also what happens to him next.|
|Feedback by Augustine - 08/13/17 - 05:09PM|
David is wrong about one thing - James obviously does still love him (and has to live every day with the guilt of having betrayed him) - but dead right about the rest. So glad he finally stood up to both of the men who mistreated him. Kirk's determination must have been just the inspiration David needed. I hope to hell that Dave was the one he shot, not James. And if Dave is dead, I wonder what that means for David. He said he wouldn't leave with Kirk and James but he probably assumed that James would simply kick Dave's ass and rescue Kirk. Speaking of James, David is absolutely right to feel the way he does. Part of me would like to see him forgive James, while the other part agrees that James doesn't deserve it. This story pulls my emotions in so many conflicting directions. So much so that it's hard to articulate how I feel about each of the characters because it literally changes by the second. I mean that as a sincere compliment, because it's often the same way in life, and the best stories are the ones that feel genuine and true regardless of plot. Thank you, by the way, for spoiling me with all these frequent updates. Nice not having to bite my nails waiting for a new chapter after a cliffhanger. Onto the next!|
Augustine's response: I forgot to mention, kudos once again on how realistically you depict the Dave/David dynamic. The grimy little room that David is locked away in while Dave sleeps in the lap of luxury elsewhere in the house, so that David never forgets his "true place." I suspect this arrangement happens all too often in real-life trafficking scenarios. Chilling, heartbreaking, and very well done.
Shameshxme's response: The one thing I struggle most with in writing is realism, so reading that I'm doing well makes me giddy beyond belief. I really appreciate you picking apart the emotions within this whole mess, your feedback helps me stay motivated to finish this story! Thank you so much for sticking with this story (nearly) the whole way through. I'm really hoping you'll enjoy the ending I hit on the dartboard of possible endings.
|Feedback by TrashHeart1ö - 08/11/17 - 07:02AM|
|Holy shit, this story is so exciting and full of tension! Please promise me that the next chapter cames doon cause this cliffhanger is so good that it is cruel!|
|Feedback by JessyUlrich - 08/10/17 - 10:59AM|
Jesus this story is fucking phenomenal! Like HOLY SHIT the suspense is unreal! I love your description of each character. I can tell you spent hours on this and I am so grateful for your writing! Seriously it's amazing! I love the contrast between Junior and Dave's relationship versus Kirk and James'. I love how Dave showed compassion to Kirk at James' house. Even though I later learned that he used the same tactic to get Junior to trust him. Kind of shitty to do that to an innocent boy honestly. :( I know James seemed kind of cold towards Kirk, but I also see why. He's torn, at least from what I see, and he doesn't want to drag Kirk into the middle of things, but then again what choice does he have now? From the moment he brought Kirk to his house he knew that bringing him into the middle of things was inevitable. Then Kirk fell in love with him, and I think James knows that Kirk's love is genuine. Hell, he had to know that Junior was in love with him too. I sincerely hope that Junior didn't shoot James.. lord I am praying right now that he either missed or shot Dave. Dave is really turning into a creep honestly. He tries to cover it up by allowing freedom and showing hollow compassion, but I see right through his tactics. It's great that Junior protected Kirk, but has his love for James gotten the best of his emotions? God I can't wait to read the next update. I will be on the edge of my seat waiting for the next chapter. I love this story so fuckin much and you write it so beautifully. You have a gift dear <3333 I love your writing so much. |
Shameshxme's response: Oh my word, thank you so so much for this glorious message !!! Heck I don't even know how to respond. I'm really really glad you're appreciating this story, I'm glad you're enjoying it, and I'm super glad you took the time to write this. I can assure you the next chapter will be up soon, I'm not sure when, but soon. And I have a few more plans brewing up for where I wanna take this universe ..
|Feedback by marjain - 08/10/17 - 02:57AM|
Oh dear, dear... this is so awesome, i wait these chapters in such anticipation that i can't even explain.
This is my game of thrones damn this might be even better that got.
Thank you, now i wait the next one in sheer excitment, and wonder who what and why...
Please let there be a happy ending... |
Shameshxme's response: Oh my goodness your feedback gives me life. I assure you you won't have to wait long for the next chapter, and the next won't be the last, either. I hope you continue to enjoy!
|Feedback by Augustine - 08/09/17 - 06:16PM|
|"But I guess you forget what you want to remember and remember what you want to forget." Ain't that the truth? This chapter was absolutely heartbreaking. Any comfort that Kirk and David might otherwise take from each other's presence is all but negated by the overwhelming sense of futility and despair that pervades their every interaction. (Still glad they're no longer alone.) And you weren't kidding in that previous reply where you said you couldn't resist making Dave more evil. He certainly is that. But he's a very, very well written villain. You portray him as a textbook abuser, able to go from genuinely charming to nightmarishly violent in a heartbeat and who deflects the responsibility (and blame) for his own misdeeds onto the people who are actually the victims. It's disturbingly true to life, which makes him far scarier than some over-the-top, mustache twirling villain. And speaking of true to life? Kirk and Junior. Their dynamic with Dave, their abuser, is spot on. I really hope they can both escape with their lives. I'm still not sure if I "ship" them or would rather they just stay friends, but I like how they stand up for each other and bring out the honesty and humanity in one another. As for James, I hope that Rob checks the parking garage and finds him before he succumbs to whatever injuries Dave inflicted. Who knows if "fucked up" means black eyes and a broken nose or something life threatening like head trauma? I was half expecting Kirk to agree to stay with Dave in exchange for being allowed to see James. Keeping my fingers crossed that we find out soon what exactly happened to him. Thank you for posting a new chapter so quickly! You're spoiling me with all these quick updates. Looking forward to my next fix. :)|
|Feedback by marjain - 08/09/17 - 06:17AM|
|The developments, oh they are interesting, i do hope this continues soon, as this is a damn good.|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 08/09/17 - 04:41AM|
|This is getting even more interesting. Great chapter. Cant wait for the next one.|
|Feedback by Augustine - 08/08/17 - 05:43PM|
|Oh shit...I can't even comment on how hot the beginning of this chapter was because now the ending has me worried sick. Where the hell is James? Did Dave get a hold of him after dropping off Junior, or did he go somewhere else entirely? (I wonder if he changed his mind and decided to rat Dave out to Nick after all.) It's hard to imagine that James would just leave Kirk behind - sick, no less - while he ran off on a fool's errand. Especially knowing what Dave is capable of. Speaking of fools, I can't decide if Kirk is one or if he's brave for going to Dave's house like that. I would urge him and Junior to make a break for it now if I didn't think that it would turn out badly for both of them. Who knows what kind of sadistic rampage Dave would go on in retaliation? At least they have each other for comfort, however long it lasts. My mind is still spinning with the possibilities of where Dave and James may be, but I'll try to put the speculations aside until the next update. Each chapter has proven me wrong in the best of ways so far. Keep 'em coming! This story is like a drug and you have me hopelessly addicted.|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 08/08/17 - 06:58AM|
|I hope the next chapter comes sooner than one week lol|
|Feedback by marjain - 08/08/17 - 04:20AM|
|Twisting with excitment, oh dear plot thickens. This is very very good, i cant wait the next chapter.|
|Feedback by Augustine - 08/08/17 - 04:50PM|
Let's see if there's enough blood left in my brain for a coherent review...
I'm both shocked and not at all surprised by Kirk's overwhelming attraction to Dave. Shocked for the obvious reasons, not at all surprised for, well, also the obvious reasons. And I don't mean the aphrodisiacs. If that was the only thing affecting him, he'd probably be repulsed mentally even though his body was experiencing pleasure. I think Dave really is just that sexy. Especially when he puts aside the usual sneering threats in favor of playfulness and genuine charm (however superficial the latter may be). Plus Dave is gorgeous. No denying that. Couple that with jealousy and alienation from seeing James fall back into Junior's arms - and an opportunity to give James a dose of his own medicine - and it's not hard to see why Kirk would be all over Dave. Honestly, I probably would be too. I have a feeling that Dave was hoping for exactly this outcome, even if he wasn't certain it would work out this way, despite his claims to the contrary. Fucker knows what he's doing. Now he has no less than three puppets dangling from his hands. I have to say, there was something perversely satisfying about seeing James angry with jealousy while Kirk was happily riding Dave. I'm still rooting for him but I kind of feel like he deserved that. And I loved, LOVED when Kirk and Junior locked hands and then started making out. I'd been hoping something like that would happen. Now I'm wondering if those two will end up running away together. Leaving James and Dave behind with nothing but each other's miserable company. That might actually be a more befitting fate for Dave than death. But still, part of me wants to see Kirk and James (and Junior) live happily ever after while Dave pays for his crimes. But hey. Whatever ending you choose, I'll be happy with because I trust you to tell a damn good story. Onto the next chapter...
|Feedback by 27fires - 08/03/17 - 02:12PM|
|Brilliant chapter x amazing work !|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 08/03/17 - 09:18AM|
|When is the next update? Love this story ❤❤|
|Feedback by TrashHeart1ö - 08/02/17 - 07:03AM|
|That was hot, especially with the unusual but great pairings!|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 08/01/17 - 08:11AM|
Oh my Lord, that was beautiful. Dave/Kirk is an underrated ship. We need more of it.|
Shameshxme's response: Hehe, thank you. I turned my little Kirky into some fetishist for Dave's evil nature and so far, I'm liking the way it's turning out. I felt like young Kirk and mature Dave were a pretty visually appealing couple, too. And I completely agree that it's underrated, considering the huge personality difference between the two; it's just perfect.
|Feedback by marjain - 08/01/17 - 05:27AM|
Oh my, ohmy... some weird perverse mindblown playdate you got there, this is great keep it coming.
I doubt hammett/mustaine combo being the most usual one in such manner but in here it works, all that beautiful hair.
James is clearly not so into sharing.|
Shameshxme's response: Thank you for the compliment! So far I'm liking Kirk/Dave a lot...I'm going somewhere with it but I won't spoil it.
|Feedback by Augustine - 08/08/17 - 03:42PM|
|Dave needs to die (just calling James "Jimmy" is a capital offense in itself) and I can't think of anyone who deserves the honor more than Junior. Or maybe Junior and Kirk together. I had to shake my head at James' refusal to do anything that would get Dave killed. The man threatened James' children, for crying out loud! Not to mention what he did to Junior. Nice twist, by the way, revealing that James still has feelings for Junior. Clever as hell of Dave to set up the video call like that. He obviously knows that James can't resist Junior and probably knew that Kirk would be watching too. Sowing the seeds of discord between James and Kirk in hopes that James will either give up Kirk or Kirk will leave James out of jealousy and betrayal and come willingly to Dave. Odious as Dave is, he gets serious points for planning. I despise him but also want to see more of him because he's such an excellent villain. But back to Kirk...I felt awful for him when James started getting turned on by Junior (and used poor Kirk to get him off while fantasizing about another man right in front of him!). This story has so many layers. So many delicious sources of tension. Like I said in the first chapter, it's like you tapped into my mind and then wrote about all my favorite things. And I ♥ you for it!|
|Feedback by 27fires - 07/31/17 - 09:01AM|
|Just wow , waiting for the next chapter. Your writing style is really excellent x|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 07/31/17 - 08:31AM|
|Amazing chapter as always 👏|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 07/31/17 - 04:07AM|
|This review has been removed by the author of the fic.|
|Feedback by marjain - 07/30/17 - 11:52AM|
|Oh dear, this is gonna very dirty business here, and more characters start to come forth, i am curious, what plans James actually have as it could be more than just what Dave planned. I am waiting the next chapter.|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 07/29/17 - 03:57PM|
|So far, so good. Looking forward to the next chapter. This is getting interesting.|
|Feedback by Augustine - 07/28/17 - 09:04PM|
|Wow, that was NOT what I expected at all! Figured it was drug trafficking or something more typical like that. Or that James was in debt to the Mafia. But like I said in my previous review, I knew this fairy tale life was too good to be true. Now I suspect that Kirk was hired at the dealership for this specific reason. Gives me chills to think that James' comment about "the interview" was more than just sweet words. I wouldn't blame Kirk one bit had he rushed down those stairs and agreed to leave with Dave - except that he would obviously be walking into a nightmare. Dave doesn't strike me as the type to simply "cuddle" Kirk and keep him to himself. Not if David's traumatized voice is any indication. Poor David. Poor Kirk. Hell, poor Lars, even. I thought his cold demeanor toward Kirk was simple jealousy, but now we know it was something far more painful. Even though James has obviously fallen for the merchandise and changes his mind, I think Kirk should run for his life. But how far would he get? Is he stuck with James now because there's no safer option? I can only imagine how violated and betrayed he must feel. And Mustaine...man, is he a nasty piece of work in this story! Makes my version look like a pussycat by comparison. ;) Someone needs to kill him. It'll probably be James if that happens, but David or Kirk would be more deserving of the honor. Wow, and to think I assumed that the danger was all a ruse to get Kirk in bed. It's real and it's even scarier than I imagined. I also didn't think I could be any more hooked on this story than I already was, but DAMN. The stakes just went sky high. Please update soon. Please, please, please?|
|Feedback by marjain - 07/28/17 - 06:58PM|
|Oh, this is getting very interesting. some form of human trafficking and shady business, hm, totally looking forward.|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 07/28/17 - 05:07PM|
|So far, so good. Looking forward to the next chapter. This is getting interesting.|
|Feedback by Augustine - 07/28/17 - 08:29PM|
|I know exactly how Kirk feels because I'm the same way when it comes to this story: suspicious and curious as hell about the mysterious goings-on whenever James isn't around and immediately lulled back into contentment whenever James returns. This arrangement of theirs is definitely too good to be true. It sounds like literal heaven, this luxurious life where Kirk lives with the man of his dreams who gives him everything he could ever wish for, and yet there's obviously something rotten underneath it all. Can't wait to find out who Mustaine is in this story and how he fits into the whole shady car dealership business. (And what exactly is this "inventory," I wonder?) I'm loving all the little references to their real-life interests and absolutely drooling over your descriptions of James. He really has aged like fine wine, hasn't he? Thank you for bringing my fantasies to life with this story. I'm savoring every word and detail like the delicious morsels they are.|
|Feedback by nsixxnsixx - 07/28/17 - 12:53PM|
|AHHHH THIS IS SO GOOD|
|Feedback by Augustine - 07/26/17 - 06:09PM|
|Lucky, lucky Kirk. Wouldn't we all love to be in his position right now? And of course you know I have a huge weakness for Dom!James spanking the hell out of his poor helpless sub. (David Ellefson and Jason Newsted have the honor in my stories; it's a treat to see Kirk in this role for a change.) That being said, I hope this isn't the last we've seen of the car dealership and whatever shady dealings are going on there. Still curious if James and Kirk were really in danger or if that was all a ruse to get Kirk exactly where James wanted him. Thank you for updating so quickly! Keep doing that and you're gonna spoil me rotten. This story is absolute candy to me. I love it!|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 07/26/17 - 03:43PM|
|Looking forward to the next part.|
|Feedback by marjain - 07/26/17 - 01:18PM|
|This is fascinating, i am totally into it, now i wonder what shall happen next, and what is this all about... James seem to be having various hidden motifs, or am i reading too much.|
|Feedback by Augustine - 07/25/17 - 10:21PM|
"The glass touches my lips and I can't control myself from rolling my eyes back as it washes down my throat. A bit dribbles over the side of my mouth and James wipes it away with his forefinger, only to push it into my mouth afterward. I suck on it like a cherry before he pulls it from my mouth." Damn. That was HOT. I may have even gasped out loud. Please update as soon as you can. I'm dying to know what all the secrecy and cloak-and-dagger stuff was about. Are they really in danger or was that all a ruse to lure Kirk into James' clutches? What's with the ring? Why can't Kirk go home again? I have my theories but will keep them to myself for now and do my best to be patient until the next chapter is ready. In the meantime, I'll be daydreaming about how hot it will be when these two finally go to bed together. |
Shameshxme's response: I'm so so glad you're enjoying my story, I'm a very big fan of your work and your feedback means a whole lot to me..!! Also, this story is probably going to have alarmingly frequent updates because I can't surround myself with enough daddy kink James Hetfield to save my life. I hope you enjoy the rest of it!
|Feedback by JessyUlrich - 07/24/17 - 07:25PM|
|OH SWEET JESUS!!!!!!!! THAT WAS SO FUCKING HOT!!!! LORD HAVE MERCY!!!! I need more! <33333 Your writing is amazing!!!!|
|Feedback by LedSabbathQueenie - 07/24/17 - 05:10PM|
THAT WAS INCREDIBLE, PLEASE UPDATE SOON|
Shameshxme's response: Thank you! I'm working on it hehe
|Feedback by Augustine - 07/25/17 - 09:55PM|
Holy shit, it's like you read my mind and put all of my favorite things into a story (about my favorite people, no less). Gritty crime noir AU, check. Age differences, check. Illicit sexual encounters, check. Imbalances of power, check. Current-era James with his delicious button down shirts, check. It's like Christmas has come early for me! Or Ficmas, as we call it around here. Anyway. This story is off to a hell of a start. You had me hooked just from the premise, but now I'm one chapter in and completely addicted and craving more. I love Kirk's voice in this. It really sounds like the narration that you'd hear in a movie or a pulp novel, when you hear the thoughts exactly as they're going through the narrator's head, in a conversational voice that sounds like the character himself rather than the author speaking through the character. (Hope that makes sense. I often worry about this when I'm writing first person fics. This is one that I can look back on as an example of how to do it right.) I also love the roles that you've cast the various band members in and how perfectly they fit their real-life personalities. Jason, Rob, Lars...especially Lars. I'll be curious to see what happens when he inevitably finds out about Kirk and James' relationship, considering his obvious crush on James. I'm also curious what roles Dave and David will play once they make an appearance. And of course what exactly the sleazy dealings entail. Right now I'm writing a crime AU too, and it's so much fun to read another story in the same genre while I take a brief break between chapters. Thank you so much for posting this! You have no idea what a treat it is. And welcome to Rockfic, by the way. I sincerely hope you'll stick around and keep writing.|
Shameshxme's response: I absolutely cannot tell you how much it means to get feedback like yours! I'm super excited to finally post something on here, and the fact that it's already getting positive feedback is amazing to me. Thank you so much!
|Feedback by JessyUlrich - 07/24/17 - 07:03PM|
Oh my god what an amazing start this was!! Can I just say how excited I am that there is a second chapter for me to read?! This is really hot so far, and I am very intrigued to see where you take this. :) I love this fic! Onto the next chapter for me! :D <333333|
Shameshxme's response: I'm so glad you're enjoying it so far! Thank you for the read! :D